Have Patience

I came home today from a weekend in Indiana celebrating my mom's birthday (unlike my dad I WON'T tell her age) :) . On my way home I listened to this song several times

My favorite part of the song is where she sings:
"So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world
Oh Oh Oh
This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what
You're doing It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use."

Then I was reading in Psalm 130:5: "I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope..." (ESV)

My thought on this is simply this: Patience is not one of those virtues that I can wrap my arms around easily. There are things/times when I am patient but then I start to wonder what God is up to and want it to happen NOW. It's like the lyrics to the song I posted above: ...And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing It might not be what I would choose But this is the stuff You use."

He knows exactly what He is doing- and that's all I need to know.

(As a little side note- the title of this reminds me of The Music Machine and the song Have Patience
Have patience, have patience
Don't be in such a hurry
When you get impatient, you only start to worry
Remember, remember that God is patient, too
And think of all the times when others have to wait for you

So, as I wait "patiently" I will use that time to grow and develop that trust in Him!

Is it wrong to dream?

Merriam-Webster defines dream as:

(n) a : a strongly desired goal or purpose dream of becoming president> b : something that fully satisfies a wish

(v)

: to have a dream of

2

: to consider as a possibility

3

: to pass (time) in reverie or inaction

It's something I know that we all do- to dream of what we want for the future, to dream of what we wish we had done different in the past, even to escape reality for a little while. But is this harmful? Does it set us up for unrealistic expectations? As a single I dream of being married someday- and while I don't want it to be to the wrong person am I wrong to dream that dream?

I'm not completely sure of that answer- I think maybe I need to change my dream and instead dream of HIM and what HE wants for me. Jeremiah 29:11-13 (which has become very dear to me this past week) clearly states

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (NIV)

He knows my heart's desire, he knows my dreams, he knows my future... and his plans for me are not going to hurt me- they are there to give me hope. I think it all boils down to v. 13- when I seek HIM with ALL of my heart (not 1/4, not 1/2, not even most- ALL) I will find Him.

ETA: For Christmas my dad got me the book "What Happens When Women Walk in Faith" by Lysa Terkeurst and I started reading it tonight- the introduction is about dreams- the part that stuck out to me "When a woman begins to walk in faith toward God, He will give the dream." Resting in that tonight.

Focus

2010 was a strange year and right now I'm not sure where 2011 is going to take me- however, I know that with God's help I will get through it and will come out stronger on the other side. With that said- my one word for 2011 is:

FOCUS

Part of the personal stuff was that I lost my focus- I shifted my eyes off that which really mattered in my life and especially my relationship with Christ. I didn't lose it- just allowed the subtle shift that didn't make it #1. For me-I have to keep Him #1. So- that's the first part of my focus- the spiritual focus.

The second part of my focus is my physical focus. I was going to bed later and later as the days went by. For my physical well-being I am going to HAVE to go to bed at a decent time and even more importantly- make time for me- in exercising. I have to make it a priority. I have a goal for the end of January- I want to hit it- to do so means I will need a shift in my priorities. That also means I need to control my diet. As of today- January 1- I have no soda in my house- my goal is to not drink any sodas in the month of January. I love me some Diet Dew so this will be a hard one for me- but something has to give. Water, water, water....

The third part of my focus is my relational focus. This is part of the personal stuff that made 2010 a strange year. I am going to work on making my relationships Christ-centered and they need to be both a give and take. If I am giving, giving, giving then I know that relationship is going to burn me out. I am going to work on the balance in relationships and work on trusting...

My verse for the year that I feel really goes along with this word of focus is:
"Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth, give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name." Psalm 86:11 (NIV)

The word UNDIVIDED is key here- ESV refers to it as unite the heart. I want my heart to be completely undivided.

Waiting...

Life threw me a little curveball this week- but I guess that's part of what happens in life isn't it? I was listening to my iTunes earlier today (Saturday) and this song came on- I have never seen this movie- and probably will someday but now is probably not the time- anyway, this song just really meant a lot to me while I was listening. I'm in a waiting place- I don't know what I am waiting for- but I am waiting and I know that through the waiting I can trust HIM!



ETA- interestingly enough I wrote this back on Dec. 10- this holds true even today- 20 days later.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon his shoulder,
and his name shall be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Isaiah 9:6

The Wizard of Oz

Tonight I was watching The Wizard of Oz on tv- not a movie I have watched all the way through (that I can remember) but I have watched bits and pieces in the past. Anyway, the part that struck me was the part where they (Dorothy, the tinman, and the scarecrow) meet up with the Cowardly Lion and they are talking about what they want to ask the wizard for. The tinman wants a heart, the scarecrow wants a brain, the cowardly lion wants courage and Dorothy just wants her home.

Isn't that what we all want- in all of us is a piece of each of those characters in what we want. The things is- if we are believers- we have all of that through our relationship with God (in this analogy- the wizard- but obviously I don't see God as a wizard).

The Tin Man (wants a heart): In Psalm 33:20-21 tells us how to have that heart

²⁰Our soul waits for the LORD;
he is our help and our shield.
²¹For our heart is glad in him,
because we trust in his holy name.

The Scarecrow (wants a brain-aka wisdom): Psalm 111:10

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom;
all those who practice it have a good understanding.

The Cowardly Lion (wants courage): Joshua tells over and over (such as in Joshua 1:9)

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."

Dorothy (wants to go home): Our earthly home is just temporary as stated in 2 Corinthians 5:1

"For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens."

Just a few thoughts from a classic movie and a classic Book which both have stood the test of time.

Broken Dreams...

When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears
and delivers them out of all their troubles.
The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
and saves the crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:17-18

Years ago I heard the following poem:

Broken Dreams
By: Author Unknown

As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God
Because He was my friend.

But then instead of leaving Him
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
With ways that were my own.

At last I snatched them back and cried,
"How could you be so slow"
"My child," He said, "What could I do?
You never did let go."

It made a huge impact on me then because so often I think I am leaving something in God's hands only to take it back because He is working too slow. Tonight my heart was broken- not in a shattered mess but enough that some of the pieces are there on the ground. 6 years ago I was wounded deeply- and I put up that wall around my heart- I have not let anyone in or even thought about letting anyone in until recently. I started letting part of the wall come down- slowly- but carefully- and then tonight- I remembered why that wall was there- so I wouldn't get hurt. But as I told this person- if I don't let the wall down then I could miss the blessing that God wants to place there. It's such a risk- one I am not sure I want to take anymore...