Sunday, October 28, 2012


Some things have happened personally that I cannot share but suffice it to say my heart is broken for the people involved.  And then I start the questions- God you could have stopped this- why didn't you?  What lessons are you teaching ME through this?  What can I do?  and on and on they go.  In the midst of this I was listening to my ipod and heard this song by Britt Nicole.  She has a unique music style that isn't for everyone and she happens to fit in well with my running playlist so I like her but this song just says it all...

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Waiting is hard...

Psalm 130:5-6a
"I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord." (ESV)

One simple sentence with so much packed into it!

Waiting is so hard- waiting for the first day of school, a birthday, a package, waiting for a spouse to come into your life, waiting to see Jesus, etc. Regardless of who you are- waiting is hard.  To wait involves patience- and the not knowing.  I think that's the hardest thing for me- the not knowing- when will it end?  When will my prayer be answered?  And yet, through it all- I find HOPE.  Hope that He is truth, that his word, his promises will not return void, that I can trust and rest- dependent on Him.

Three times in the verse waiting is mentioned.  I have always been told if something is repeated three times it's extremely important and I need to take notice.  It doesn't mean it's going to be easy but it does mean that "something" will happen during the waiting and at the end of the waiting.

So, even though it's hard- still I hopeful expectation.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Blank Slate

I have been back to work for a week now, and today (Tuesday) was the first day for students (however, mine actually start on Wednesday).  This year promises to be challenging, stressful, fun, exciting, interesting, crazy, and so much more but the biggest thing that I have focused on this past week?  This year is a blank slate- we start fresh with new students and new mindsets.  The challenge is to remember that every DAY is a blank slate.  It's like that in my spiritual life also- there are days that are challenging, stressful, fun, etc.  There are obstacles in the way- there always will be but the Word says it all in Lamentations 3:

"But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.” The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him." Lamentations 3:21-25 (ESV)

I have decided that this passage is my theme verse for this school year.  To remember that his mercies are new every morning, that HE is my portion, and above all- where my hope should be.  My prayer is that this verse becomes ingrained in my heart and therefore in my life and my mind as well.  That I live this verse "out loud" on a daily basis- that I live it from "the inside out".

Thursday, July 26, 2012

A Grieving Heart

I have been praying and pondering how to say what I want to say regarding this subject.  I finally hit upon it today while running some errands and listening to the radio.  A song that I have heard several times played today but today it struck a chord.  Before I go into that let me just say this- I have struggled because while we live in a country that supposedly values free speech I have felt that this situation has shown some of the double standard that is out there today.

Okay, here are my thoughts:

I think the Jesus that I love and serve would be grieved over the words and actions of what Christians today are saying and doing.  I'm not referring to Mr. Cathy.  I am referring to those who call themselves believers in response to those who don't agree with Mr. Cathy.  I have seen hate, contempt, and judgement spewed on comments left on articles, on Facebook and in various other places.  Bottom line, IF you are a believer and read the same Bible that I read, we are ALL sinners in need of grace- none of us are better than another and the only difference between myself and a non-believer is that I have chosen to accept Christ's forgiveness and salvation.  There's an old camp song that says- "They'll know we are Christians by our love, by our love, oh they'll know we are Christians by our love."   So, maybe, the way to end the condemnation, the hate that is being spread is to love, just love!

Oh, and the song?  Here you go:

Sunday, July 22, 2012


Just struggling right now- off my routine and it has totally thrown me for a loop- one good thing about school starting soon?  My schedule will have normalcy to it!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

What was Judas thinking??

I know that question conjures up the thought of his betrayal and yes, this sort of covers that- but THAT is greed- pure and simple.  And really, who has not been overtaken by greed somewhere along the line in their life.  But, no, this goes to John 13.  This morning I read this passage of Jesus washing the disciples' feet.  It was interesting to read the reaction of Peter and his responses but then I got to wondering- what about Judas?.  Here he is listening to Jesus talk about why he was washing feet and how that was what they were to do to others in order to serve- so, what was he thinking?  He had already decided to betray Jesus and here he is listening to Jesus tell that he KNEW who was going to betray him!  Was he thinking- I need to run and just get it done?  What am I doing?  about the money?  Did any thoughts of guilt or remorse about what he was going to do enter into his mind and heart at all?  I just can't help but wonder- what was Judas thinking?

Monday, June 11, 2012

Checking things off

I have been able to do at least one or two things on my list already- however, I am addressing one that will take me through the whole year- reading a book a week.  Last week I was "at home" in Indiana (you know- it's funny, when I am in TN then IN is home but when I am in IN then TN is home- so strange how that works).  Anyway, after my dad posted THIS BLOG back in January I requested to read the book I Am Second.  He sent it to me within a couple of weeks and I just now had a chance to read it- this book was a really good book.  .I laughed and cried, my heart ached for the hurt of others and rejoiced in their joy.  I am a regular watcher of Biggest Loser so the story of Michelle Aguilar was one that I watched unfold on tv.  I actually have her book on the Kindle app on my iphone to read and now it has become a MUST READ.  I am looking forward to spending some time this summer watching the videos on the I Am Second website but I leave you with this:

Seconds - I Am Second

Sunday, June 3, 2012

38 before 38...

Yep, I turn 37 today so I decided I am making a list of 38 things that I want to do BEFORE I turn 38- a year away.

1. Run a 5k- just for the fun of it.  I am planning on The Color Run in Nashville in October but would like to plan on a couple more.  I need the discipline and motivation to train for something.
2. Travel to a state I have never been to- there are several including some in the northeast.  I would love to travel that way sometime. or even to D.C.
3. Purchase a bicycle and begin riding for fun and for exercise.
4. Post on my card blog a minimum of 3 times a week
5. Make 100 cards to donate to an organization such as Operation Write Home, Ronald McDonald House, or some other cause.
6. See Chipper Jones play at least one last game in his retirement season (was planning on this on Sunday, May 27, but he went on the D.L. :( )
7.Log 150 miles of "running"/walking- outside or on the treadmill.
8. Try one new pinterest recipe a week.
9. Complete one pinterest DIY/craft/inspiration project per month.
10. do something that is out of the ordinary with my hair :)

11. Take a month and take one picture every day (could be nature, creativity, people, sights, etc)- I think I'll do June 3, 2012-July 3, 2012.
12. Lose weight and get to a healthy weight in a healthy way.
13. Visit a Civil War site here in the south.  I have been to Gettysburg (and would love to go back).  I am heading to Murfreesboro for a training in July and there is one there...
14. Read at least one book a week (not a feat for the summer but when school starts...)
15. Organize my craft stuff in a way that makes sense and gets used more often :)
16. Donate platelets every few months or so.
17. Get my fitness blog back up and running- with what I am not sure yet.
18. Put the birthdays of family and friends in my calendar and work on getting cards out ON TIME!
19. Become more consistent in my gym attendance...
20. Learn how to sew

21. Post on my "faith" blog (this one) a minimum of 2 times a month.
22. Go to a spin class at the YMCA (or with my friend Rae Ann at the gym where she works- I have 20 classes to use) :)
23.  Tell my family I love them as often as possible!
24. Get ahead on my lesson plans (this is two pronged- working on them this summer and getting ahead once school starts)
25. Spend more time out with my friends (in my friend Cindy's words- to not be a hermit)
26. Ride a zipline (there are lots of the zipline tours in this area...)
27. Get rid of one bag of "clutter" a week either by taking it to the thrift store or the garbage.
28. Spend some time  with some of the cutest babies I know (friends who are having babies and friends who have adopted babies)
29. Spend as much time with my nephew as possible.  He'll be in Kindergarten this year :( and turning 6 in October- time goes way too fast.
30. Spend some time prepping for the areas at school (taking pictures of area places for word walls, block area, etc)
31. Wean myself off sodas for water/crystal light (this will be a hard one for me- I have done it before for 2-3 months so I know it can be done- I just need to make it longer!)
32. Go to a UT football game- I know, it makes no sense- I'm a Buckeye fan (and would love to go to one of those games) but think this might be a little easier.  Now, the tricky part of this is that my days for this are limited.  But, I have lived in Knoxville all but 2 years since 1993 and haven't ever been to a game- I think it's time- so if anyone can hook me up with a couple of tickets...
33. Be more bold about my faith- speaking out and sharing with others.
34. Meet at least 2 new people per month.
35. Eat at one new restaurant a month- trying to hit local businesses so if you have any suggstions let me know.
36. This is for the crafter in me- participate in one new challenge a month (paper crafting)- one that I have never participated in and one that will stretch me.
37. Set one new fitness/healthy living goal per month.  June's will be drink more water!

38. Deepen my relationship with Christ.  Gain more contentment in my life with Him and TRUSTing that He is in charge of it all and I don't have to understand it.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012


Webster defines delight as "a high degree of gratification" and then gives one of the synonyms as JOY.  This morning I read these verses from Psalm 119:35-37

Lead me in the path of your commandments,
    for I delight in it. 
  Incline my heart to your testimonies,
    and not to selfish gain! 
  Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things;
    and give me life in your ways.

I actually had to stop and chew on those for a while.  If I am delighting in Him (Psalm 37) then my delight is also found in His commandments - and I follow that path willingly.  I am turning my heart towards Him and not to my own selfish ways.  I am looking at things that are from Him and not on things that are worthless...

So the question that came to mind is- am I actually doing this?  Am I living my life in this manner?  Lots to think and ponder for a Tuesday morning...

Monday, May 21, 2012

A Wandering Heart

I started reading through the Psalms slowly this year.  I am biting off little chunks at a time and letting the words digest before I move on.  Yesterday I arrived at Psalm 119- I will be there a while- there's a lot of meat in that chapter  Verses 10 and 11 stuck out:  
"With my whole heart I seek you;
    let me not wander from your commandments! 
 I have stored up your word in my heart,
    that I might not sin against you." (ESV)

One of my favorite hymns is "Come thou Fount"- this Psalm immediately brought that hymn to mind- the part of binding our wandering heart to thee and being prone to wander just became lines over and over in my head.  It reminds me of how easily we get distracted and our heart wanders- how do we stop this to refocus?  the answer is in v.11 (and v. 32)- by storing up His word, His truths, and His promises in my heart so that I do not sin.  So easy to say but a lot harder to follow through with...

ETA- had the wrong song! (it's early)

Monday, March 12, 2012

The Least of These

I am participating in a Life on Life group (basically an intense Bible Study that is to help you grow deeper in your faith and prepare you to share that with others) and the last few weeks we have been talking about the local church. This morning I read this passage and have been stewing on it all day:

"“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. 34 Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’

41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ 44 Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ 45 Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ 46 And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.” Matthew 25:31-46 (ESV)

I guess the question that I have is how to know if something/someone is "legit"? And yes, I know that shouldn't necessarily be an issue but as a single female who does a lot of driving alone I don't know that it's necessarily safe for me to just roll my window down and have a nice little chat while sitting at a stoplight. About a week ago (when I was in the midst of misery from being sick) I left work (school) and headed home. I was about a block from school sitting at a VERY long light and I watched this lady (couldn't even begin to guess her age) try to get people to roll down their windows. I had a feeling she wanted cash (we were near the gas station) and I honestly didn't have any but as she came closer I heard her say, "Ma'am". All I could do was shake my head. The light turned green after that and I drove off. But that has haunted me since. Christ said we are to show love- to meet the basic needs of people- and by doing so we are in essence doing that to Him. But, by not doing this we are turning our back on Him as well.

So, maybe a better question is- where do we draw the line? Was I wrong to not roll the window down? I honestly am seeking opinions and thoughts on this matter. I have asked God to help me see that which is right in front of me and how I can help in the future but at the same time that scares me. Again, would love your thoughts- and will not take offense to any of them :)

This video says exactly how I feel

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Recalibrating Life...

A year ago I read the book Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst. I enjoyed it but didn't retain any of the information in the book. This year, one of my 2012 goals is to get healthy. To do so, I need to recalibrate my thoughts. Lysa states in the intro to her book,

"Getting healthy isn't just about losing weight. It's not limited to adjusting our diet and hoping for good physical results. it's about recalibrating our souls so that we want to change- spiritually, physically, and mentally. And the battle really is in all three areas."

What does that mean for me?

Spiritually-I need to make time in my life for Worship- the worship of my Creator, my Savior. Honestly, this is something I struggle with- I start off with good intentions and it goes well. I get up early and get that time in (I KNOW myself and know that it won't be happening at night) and then as the weeks progress I get more and more tired. Then, I think, "Oh, I'll do it tonight" and it ends up being several days and nights before I pick it up again. I started a new Journey group this week with several women- this has been a good week to start off this new "journey"- so far so good but I covet prayers to continue this. And that leads into....

Physically- Again, this is something I KNOW I need to do. I'll be honest, I just don't enjoy the thought of exercise. Once I have started and finish, I am SO glad that I did it but that getting started- ugh! I also know that part of the physical is also getting enough sleep. That means, if I want to fully experience the spiritual aspect then the sleep/physical aspect needs to come into play as well. When I am tired, I am less focused. I'm making a more conscious effort to go to bed at a decent time so that when the alarm clock goes off, I'm more likely to be ready to go with joy in my heart and a spring in my step :) This also means I need to make healthy food choices and surround myself with healthy food. I found a pin on pinterest that says "If you keep good food in your fridge, you will eat good food." This is the stage where I need to be- I need to not tempt myself by having that candy or chips or whatever else might be calling to me (ice cream???) and fill my world with healthy food options. And then there's the water (which will be a whole different blog post as I had some thoughts about this wonderful thirst quencher earlier this week)- cutting out the sodas again and drinking that water. And the final step is...

Mentally- this is probably the hardest one for me. Physical and Spiritual are hard BUT they are those things that have been around for my lifetime. Mentally, I struggle. I know that I don't fit the world's ideal (which is where my struggle lies) and Satan uses this to attack me. Some of the lies he tells me are, "why bother? it isn't going to make a difference." "Do you really think anyone will even notice? Nah, they won't- there's no point." "That one little donut isn't going to hurt" and on and on. Oh, he's good in that aspect- he knows my heart and knows exactly the words to say that will bring heartache. And this is probably going to be an area of further blogging as I work through it.

Anyway, this is long enough- just a little peek into the journey I am on. I will be participating in Melissa Taylor's online Bible Study for this book beginning this Sunday. I think this is exactly where I need to be right now to do this and would covet your prayers as I find my "want-to" and learn that food cannot satisfy the emptiness- only God can.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

A New Year...A New Perspective

ETA- out of habit I typed 2011 so I fixed it!

2011 is over and 2012 is just beginning. When the calendar turns from December 31 to January 1 you can't help but be a little excited- it's a new year- a blank slate.

For many 2011 was an exciting year and for others not so great. It was a year of loss, a year of questions, and a year of uncertainty. I read the following verse tonight and thought how fitting it is:

"You were wearied with the length of your way, but you did not say, “It is hopeless”; you found new life for your strength, and so you were not faint." Isaiah 57:10 (ESV).

I want that to be my legacy- that at the end of a long day, a long year it can be said of me that I did not say, "it is hopeless" but through my HOPE in Christ I have found new life for my strength and did not faint.